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Foster Parenting

Your Guide to Navigating Strain as a Foster Family

Your Guide to Navigating Strain as a Foster Family

Amanda Fleischmann is the Southwest Florida Foster Care Supervisor with 4KIDS of South Florida. She has received her Master’s of Social Work from Florida State University. Amanda is committed to helping every family thrive and feel supported in their fostering journey so that every child has an opportunity to heal and grow. She enjoys travelling with friends and family and has the goal to go to every one of the National Parks.

Your household used to run on a rhythm—afterschool activities, dinner, holidays, and vacations all flowed like clockwork. But since you started fostering, you feel stretched thin. 

The appointments are starting to pile up, you’re missing certain games or events for your biological kids due to conflicting schedules, and you have no idea the last time you and your husband had a date night. 

When left unaddressed, these strained family relationships can lead to burnout, frustration, and even resentment. 

If you’re a foster parent dealing with these emotions right now, you’re not alone. Read on to learn how to navigate family strain in a healthy, Biblical way.  

How to Manage New Dynamics with Foster Families 

Bringing anyone new into your family—even in the best of circumstances—often creates tension and uncertainty as everyone figures out what their new patterns look like.  

So, whether you are preparing to start fostering or are just starting to feel the tension with your new child, here are three ways to make your load a bit lighter.  

If you’re a new foster parent, read the “Prepare” section below. If you’re a seasoned foster parent experiencing a new wave of difficulty, head to “Repair” for tips to help. 

Prepare 

As you become a new foster parent and are getting your home physically ready to support a new child, spend even more time making sure everyone in your household is emotionally ready to start this journey. These three tips can help: 

  1. Set a missional tone. Fostering is ministry; remind each person in your home that this is an adventure you are going on together to serve kids who need it most. 
  2. Include your children. Let them help pick out the bedding for a child, as well as any toys they will be sharing.
  3. Establish some quality time. Get in a rhythm of enjoying individual time with each of your children before a new one arrives.  

Repair 

If you’re a foster parent and have already been experiencing a strained family dynamic, these tips can help you reset your home and repair any broken relationships. 

  1. Reestablish healthy routines. As a parent, you have the power to call a family reset and realign on your shared values and mission as followers of Christ.  
  2. Involve your network. You don’t have to do everything alone. The people around you are willing to help by dropping off a meal on your busiest night or picking up some of the kids from practice.
  3. Pray continually and engage with God’s Word. There is no greater support than that which comes from our Heavenly Father as we navigate life as foster parents.  

KEY TAKEAWAY 

It is regular for challenges to arise when a child is welcomed into a foster home. There are ways that you can prepare for future tension and repair the tension that may already exist. 

ACTIVITY 

Even on the busiest of days, you can still connect with your child. Play Breathe and Believe the next time you are on the go. Find it now in the Everyday MomentsTM activities collection! 

APPLICATION QUESTIONS 

  1. Are you in the “prepare” or “repair” stage of foster parenting? Prayerfully ask God to help you navigate this season. 
  2. What is one pain point in your life you can address today to bring relief to your family? 

KEY VERSE 

“Give your burdens to the Lord, and He will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” 

~ Psalms 55:22 (NLT) 

PRAYER 

Dear God, you can do all things. Please guide my family through this season and help us to glorify You. In Jesus’ name, amen.  

Table of Contents

Written by

Amanda Fleischmann, MSW

Amanda Fleischmann is the Southwest Florida Foster Care Supervisor with 4KIDS of South Florida. She has received her Master’s of Social Work from Florida State University. Amanda is committed to helping every family thrive and feel supported in their fostering journey so that every child has an opportunity to heal and grow. She enjoys travelling with friends and family and has the goal to go to every one of the National Parks.

Clinically Approved by

Meiby Nodarse, LMHC, TBRI Practitioner

Meiby Nodarse is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor with 4KIDS of South Florida. She is passionate about bringing hope and healing to foster and adoptive families through ethical clinical practice, trauma informed parent training and the gospel of Jesus Christ. She and her husband are over the moon to welcome their first baby this fall and look forward to this new chapter of their lives and marriage.

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